It’s taken me over 50 years to figure out how and why I communicate the way I do – not to mention what I need to be mentally and emotionally healthy and well. The long and the short of it, is that I am still not great at it all, and I’m way more self-aware. This self-awareness has allowed me to gain a sense of clarity when things are building up inside me, or my frustration level is off the charts. Or I can’t sleep and wake up thinking about things I “should” be doing or can’t control.
Being able to slow my brain down and figure out where I feel things in my body was not something I was used to doing, and it is the most effective way for me to get back into wise mind and my brain back “online”. In the past, when my emotions hijacked me, I would look outside of myself for what “made me feel this way” or “why”. That never really worked and in fact, it became tiring and usually left me feeling like I was the problem in some way, and I’d done something wrong.
Now, focusing on slowing my life down, and doing the best I can at “going within” allows me to get myself back to a place where I can see how I’m talking to myself or what story I might be telling myself. This often leads to fact checking and normally how I’ve been taking care of myself and my needs.
This is why we are spending the month of February to reach out to everyone who is looking for others to connect with and talk about how hard it really is to honour ourselves and practice good self-care and compassion. We are far better at taking care of other people’s needs than our own.
So, I’m extending the offer to invite others to share their experiences:
- What makes this practice so difficult?
- What prevents us from putting ourselves first?
- Testimonials of those who are doing well at their self-care practice and what that looks like?
I hope you find some ease this month and are able to explore some helpful ways of introducing more self compassion and care into your life – whatever that may be.
Warmly,
Nicole Taylor
4 Comments.
Something I have been doing for years for self-care, without even realizing it, is walking my dogs. I thought I was doing it for them, but really I find it a great way to organize my thoughts and being outside and breathing fresh air is very soothing. Especially on a beautiful day. We are very lucky to have a walk in our neighbourhood that takes us to a spot with a fabulous view of Mount Baker, and that never fails to make me feel better, to see that majestic mountain on a clear day.
I enjoy running as often as possible, especially in the sunshine. I stop often for short walk breaks. There is one spot I go to on weekends which brings me close to nature-I slow down and breath in the calm. Best of all, I can take my time and forget about schedules and expectations. This recharges me for the week ahead.
My self-care involves lots of deep breathing and taking pauses. I’m working with a fantastic somatic counsellor who really helps keep things in perspective and helps me stay grounded. I have a weighted blanket I borrowed for my daughter and I find that very useful. I have learned so much from the emotions BC group that I now make self-care a priority. I certainly never used to in the past.
When we joined emotions bc a couple of years ago- it helped us realize we are not alone out there with family members or even friends with mental health issues. We have appreciated the support efforts of the team to help guide us to better understand this issue & inform & guide us the possible learning we can benefit as to as to how to be the support team of family members or even friends of the people we love who may be struggling to the best possible way of moving forward to a hopefully health & happier life style.